Relentless

I sit here drinking in the perfect summer morning. No humidity, timid, sweet noises from a nest of baby birds in a bush not three feet away from where I sip my coffee, they waiting eagerly for mama to bring their morning breakfast, me just stopping for a brief moment.

I tried to do this yesterday. To slow down, read, write, breathe. After about 4 minutes, my leg was jumping, my coffee cup was already empty, the oppressive lists closing in on me like one long, cruel tyranny.

But I need this. This five or ten or fifteen minutes that stops the chaos. My husband took the littles for a drive and the oldest is sleeping in.

Peace. Quiet. Calm.

It's been a relentless few years for us. We have gone through and are continuing to go through some of the most stressful transitions a family can endure. Two newborns, cross country moves, new jobs, mystery illnesses, chronic sleep deprivation, all the goodbyes and making of new friends only to say goodbye again.

Some days it just feels like too much motion.

And to put it bluntly, I am glad God is stronger than I am. Because there ain't no way I'd still be standing if His strength wasn't my anchor. If his hope and peace, even on our craziest days, weren't my truth.

We move in one week. We say goodbye, we load the van with reluctant children and we set off on a new adventure.

Not that I don't like adventures, but I'm hoping for at least a few years where we can have adventures to the beach or sleepaway camp. The kind that don't shake our family's rhythm, but just bring more joy and challenges into the everyday. I'm hoping for no more moves or jobs for awhile. For the chaotic daily raising of my kids alongside friends, of working and dreaming and lots of laughter. And way fewer lists. Of no major decisions for my husband and I to wrestle through. We have had our quota for awhile, thank you very much.

For my prayer each morning to be from a verse that has continually sustained me these past seven years of change and waiting and loss and hope.

"For God alone my soul waits in silence; 

from him comes my salvation, my fortress;

 I shall not be greatly shaken." 

Psalm 62:1-2

May it be so, Lord. May it be so.

Sprucing Up

Just a few short days ago, we met with our realtor. Some people wait until then to figure out which projects need to happen around here. As this is the third home we'll be selling, I've learned at least a little over the years about what needed to happen before he even came.

Hence, the massive decluttering exercise I've been working on for months.

Hence, painting the outside trim last fall to get that out of the way.

Hence, powerwashing all the outdoor surfaces so they'll only need a quick once-over this spring.

Hence...and on and on...

You get the idea. I've been working hard.

And now it's time for some of the fun stuff. I need to make the house look a little updated, a little cheerful...and I need to do it cheaply. If there's on DIY I love, it's finding old things to make new. So, I picked a color palette that goes with our main living space and am boldly moving forward.

Project 1: Color Accents

When we moved in, the entire main floor was boring old white. And while I know it's trendy to have white walls and lots of colorful amazing artwork, I still love a little color on the walls myself. So, I painted most of the main room a pale grey with blue undertones and the kitchen and accent wall a smoke blue. Then I opened up a magazine just yesterday and saw that smoke blue is a very IN color. Well. I am rarely ahead of the game in that department. So, yippee. They had some fun suggestions on accents to go with smoke blue: mint, coral/orange, pale pink and grey. Since the walls and kitchen have lots of grey, I thought it'd be fun to pull out the spray paint.

1a: Lamp

Ok, so there isn't anything wrong with this lamp except for it's just...blah. So, I figured a coat of paint and a patterned shade could spice things up a bit. Except I can't find a patterned shade I like. So, I just painted the base so far and I'll keep my eyes peeled for a nicer shade.

BEFORE

AFTER

1b: Vases

Two old vases, scuffed and cloudy meet fresh coats of paint.

BEFORE 

AFTER

AFTER

1c: Canisters

These used to be a beigy color with rusty and green leaves so I understandably updated them when we moved here. Just a plain old white. But I thought it was time for something that would pop just a smidge more.

BEFORE

AFTER

1d: Fruit Bowl

We've had this plastic bowl for years and it's fuzzy and scuffed up now. Not exactly good for making the fruit look more appetizing. Again, a fresh coat of paint. I only painted the outside on this so the fruit wouldn't rest on the paint when I was done.

BEFORE

AFTER

Project 2: Desk Chair

We've always had this sad little corner of the kitchen without a chair. Partially I didn't want one because that area becomes even more accessible to my toddler if he can climb on to a chair, but I also just didn't feel like spending money on a chair we might only need for a few years.

Then I found a chair for $2 last week. And figured, what the heck?!

Stained, dirty and scuffed with a horrible, musty, vinyl covering.

BEFORE 

BEFORE

AFTER

AFTER

Project 3: Icky Blinds

The moment we moved in I knew our vertical blinds had to go. Dated, ugly, blah. And now, thanks to our exuberant eater, covered in food stains that won't come out. So, one quick weekend pulling them down, putting up rods and curtains and, voila!

OK, they are cute, but check out the hideous blinds in the background.

AFTER

AFTER

Man, I love curtains. What a difference.

Once done with the projects, I cleaned from top to bottom and put everything back.

At least this floor is show-ready!

Diving Into the New

If anyone has read my two posts about finally admitting my struggle with my skin and the amazing success I've had with trying a new product, you'll know that I am not in this because of skin-deep beauty. Like much of the progress in my life, I feel like God constantly has me moving in healthier directions, deep, holistic directions. Healthier expression of emotions, better intentionality in relationships, life-giving parenting strategies, a truer understanding of God and how he works. And yes, a healthier body on the inside and the outside.

I've had some people ask if I was paid to write the post I wrote yesterday. The answer? Nope. I honestly went into using these products with hope and skepticism. I've tried a lot before and while the pictures of other people I was seeing were undeniable, there's always that question: "Will it actually (finally!) work for me?"

I took a big risk and spoke about the journey before seeing major results. And 60 days in, when I saw my pictures next to each other, I couldn't believe it. I'm glad I shared before I knew if it would work but I am also really thankful I've had results.

So, while I have not been paid for anything up until now, that is going to change.

I believe in this so strongly, I believe in any person's decision to try to move forward in healthy ways in his or her life, that as of today I have joined the Rodan & Fields team.

If you had asked me even 3 months ago when I was thinking about using these products if I ever thought I'd be a part of this company, I would have laughed. Me? Sell skincare? Not on your life.

But the invitation to join in on something that has actually been life-changing for me? The invitation to have adult interaction during the week and still be able to frolic in the backyard all day long with my boys this summer? The invitation to some income that I can save for graduate school and to spend on my gardening obsession and my love of DIY projects?

That invitation is too much to pass up right now.

So while this is probably not a forever decision, it fits. When my husband is busy publishing and making connections so we can have a good future with him as a university professor, when my youngest child still needs a lot of hands-on attention, when I am at transitional place in terms of career, this works.

So, friends, if any of you are excited about what you've seen or heard or have a story similar to mine, I'd love to listen and talk and tell you about my story and what I've done. And yes, if you would like to try it, I'd love to help you see if this company might help you, too.