Close to Home

My sweet, beautiful little black boy is asleep upstairs. He spent the morning enjoying the spring weather, splashing in mud, grinning at me and using his newest word, "outside", over and over with evident pride and delight.

And as he sleeps, I cry.

Not because we are having a hard week or because I'm overwhelmed parenting a tough toddler. No, grace has been abundant this week. I am feeling good, prepared, rested, supported, hopeful. It doesn't hurt that tantrums are down a bit from last week. No, on the whole things are good in our home right now.

So why am I crying?

Because Ferguson came home to Madison this week.

Just this past Friday a young, black, unarmed man who graduated from the high school my boys will attend if we still live here 10 years from now was shot to death by a police officer.

Young, unarmed and black. Someday my son will be all those things. And because of that, he may be in danger.

So I am crying because of words recorded yesterday at a rally. A rally where countless numbers of young people who have had enough of the fear and the anger and the hate came together to hope for a better Madison, a better America. A rally where a local pastor spoke and prayed. And the words he spoke? Well, I can only hope that if we do stay here, we will see them come true.

You can see the video here.

Post by Ferguson to Madison.

As I sat here and prayed along with him, deep sadness welled up.  Some days it is hard to hope for change. How people who have experienced this type of hatred and prejudice and systemic injustice for years maintain any hope is purely miraculous to me.

Today, I stand with Pastor Gee and the Madison community and pray that

"it will not happen here again and it will not go unheeded and we will stand for justice so give us strength to stand as a community, to love each other, to hold this family and to move in a way that will honor this young man's legacy...move us beyond trying to protect our own little territories and interests and our kingdoms and our churches and our organizations and our offices...give us the strength...give us the strength to be the Madison that we want to be, that we can be, that is wonderful for every one."